Getting Through

My ninth grade students just wrapped up a unit on Warriors Don’t Cry, written by Melba Patillo Beals, one of the “Little Rock Nine” students who paved the way for integrated schools in the US. Her powerful autobiography conveys the sting of physical and emotional abuse that she suffered along with her peers and family members as they lived the history of the Brown v Board of Education decision. Melba described many horrible things that were done to her at school, like acid thrown in her face and daily physical abuse. Yet despite all the violence she endured, she says that her hero was Gandhi, and she often thought of him whenever she needed strength to continue. She never retaliated with violence toward anyone, unlike a classmate of hers who reached her breaking point and decided to toss a bowl of hot chili over a student’s head who kept tormenting her.

During the group presentations in our class, students asked their peers if they would have done the same thing. Some answered saying no way because it’s a waste of “food,” others said absolutely! In fact, they would have liked to see more harm done to the perpetrators like maybe poisoning their food by the black staff workers in the lunchroom to really teach them a lesson. And then there were a handful that said they don’t think so because one must always consider the consequences of their actions. Since the girl who tossed the chili was expelled from the school, it ultimately defeated her purpose. She was no longer able to contribute to a long-term goal of integration and instead opted for short-term gratification. I was very pleased to see students critically assessing the incident from many points of view. Listening to them discuss violence vs non-violence reminded me of a favorite poem of mine by Lao Tzu from Tao Te Ching:

Nothing in the world
is as soft and yielding as water.
Yet for dissolving the hard and inflexible,
nothing can surpass it.

The soft overcomes the hard;
the gentle overcomes the rigid.
Everyone knows this is true,
but few can put it into practice.

Lao Tzu reminds us that even water can cut through mountains over time with corrosion. I also thought of my mother’s wise advice whenever she senses I want to retaliate in a situation that upsets me: “Kill’em with kindness” she reminds me. It takes a great deal of will power and strength of character to step back from a situation, size it up, and think of all the consequences before acting. A select few historical figures have been able to do this with strength and determination, bringing about significant change for many people through non-violent protest.

Nelson Mandela suffered 27 years in prison for protesting apartheid in South Africa, yet in an interview with Bill Moyers he once said he never held any bitterness in his heart for his prison guards or the people who put him there. He understood they were victims of the system he was attempting to change. Similarly, Martin Luther King used his voice and intellect to inspire people not only during the Civil Rights era but well into our present time, long after his death, when we are still in so much need of non-violent messages to heal the pain and suffering around us. It’s no wonder that Melba’s hero was Gandhi.

I felt inspired to quickly draft a lesson on non-violence and present it to the ninth graders the very next day when their discussions were still fresh in their minds. Some seemed to understand and appreciate what I shared while others behaved in an adolescent “I don’t care” sarcastic demeanor. I miss the adult conversations I used to have with my college students when I taught lessons I felt so passionate about, such as this one, but I know there’s a way to reach even the most reluctant younger learners and I’m enjoying the bumpy ride as I find it.